Sunday, February 22, 2015

Quitting the thing that defines you...

The next several weeks if you go to the grocery store in my area (and probably any area in the USA), you have to run the girl scout gauntlet.  Lord knows I love their cookies.  Lord also knows I don't need their cookies.  Today was the first day I had seen them outside the grocery store so I stepped up to get a box of Samoas.  I happened to have on my Ironman Louisville ski cap.  The Mom in charge asks me if I had done an Ironman to which I said yes.  She said "well you DESERVE these cookies".  They still cost me $4 so apparently I didn't deserve them for free...  ha ha.

It is funny what kind of admiration that race gets you and in the most unusual places.  I have never been one of those people who wore that accomplishment on my sleeve.  (Granted, today I had it on my head but normally I keep it on the down-low).  I could talk to you for hours about my hobbies and never mention it.  As much as I don't like to put my accomplishment out there in the course of conversation, until recently it was very much a part of my every day life.      

"What I learned quitting the thing that defined me" was the title of the article I saw on Hey Eleanor yesterday.  It kind of describes where I am at perfectly.  The thing that defined me.  In many ways after five years of 24/7 triathlon, specifically Ironman, it defined me.  It was I did in most of my waking (non-working) moments.  It was a part time job; twice a day and all weekend long for most weekends.  When I wasn't swimming, biking or running I was thinking about swimming, biking or running or packing my gear for my next workout (which I suppose still counts as thinking about SBR...)

...and 100% happy with it!

Back in December when I decided that burnout had gotten the best of me it felt very freeing.  Lately it feels like a weird place to be in.  It isn't that I haven't moved on and managed to fill every waking minute with other things but it is still a transition.  For years, when Rick would talk about his friends they were always "skydiving friends" or "motorcycle friends" or...  you get the idea.  As your hobbies change, your group of friends sort of change as well.  The thing that makes it harder to not feel like a quitter is that your entire facebook feed is filled with these groups of people.  People you used to have things in common with, people who are still doing the thing that you stepped away from.

Don't get me wrong, I have been filling my time with some awesome 'crossfit-like' workouts at the gym (AKA crossfit but they can't call it that because of branding. You still get the same hand callouses).  So there is that.  I also played a little tennis this winter.  I have been running here and there.  I had a great 10k race yesterday.  My goggle marks have *finally* gone away.  LOL.  All in all, it has been a great break from triathlon and I don't regret my decision to quit.  I have been able to take classes and do things I never would have had time to do in the past and that is worth so much more to me than any medal at this point in my life.  For now, I will enjoy my transition time and cheer on my triathlon friends from the sidelines.  :)